I have better things to do than watch our employees poop habits but one thing that is super odd to me is the amount of people that come to work and the first thing they do is take a dump. Are they getting up in time? Have they set their clock wrong and that’s where its set permanently? Are they eating something on the way in that releases the hounds. It got to the point that I had several people clocking in and then spending the first 10 minutes in the bathroom. Not the easiest conversation but we put it in a letter asking “everyone to be ready for work when the come in” Threw in getting clothes on and other things so it wasn’t a direct “don’t poop first thing” letter.
For me its not about the money, its that wholesale customers come in to get their stuff so they can get working and I have everyone in the bathrooms and portapotties. I also come in early to get things done and other people come in early to take a dump. Like they don’t have one in their house. It also is an uncomfortable greeting for me each day as they tear up the bathroom each morning.
We had a writer here in the early days named Chris that made an app that measured how much money you were being paid to take a dump at work. You put in your annual salary and then time the timer and it would calculate out the payout. You could compare it to other celebrities and athletes salaries and how much they would have gotten paid for your poop. I thought it was hilarious but not sure it ever caught on or even if the things we talked about were added.
Maybe I should have required all the employees add the app. I’m sure they’d love being pooped monitored
Quote of the Day: If aliens are watching us through telescopes, they’re going to think the dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them’s making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge? -Jerry Seinfeld
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Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That’s why I poop on company time.
Funny post at first, but I can see it affecting the bottomline. It’s like this at a lot of companies. Maybe people are saving money on water and toilet paper so they Crap at work.
Crap happens! https://chucklebuzz.com/blog/funny-words-poo/3027/
I had a guy that would ask to stop while we were driving between jobs and use a gas station restroom. It would take him 30 minutes. I finally realized he was in there texting friends instead… bye bye